This is This...That is That

I have randomness running through my head this morning, oh wait, sorry, it's afternoon.
First off, most exciting news - my sister Shawna and her husband Matt welcomed their little girl Sabine Maya Willits yesterday - and she is so cute! She was born on July 28th at 12:30 PM weighed just over 8Lbs with a .06 OZ and was 22/21? inches long I'm so glad everything went well with the labor and delivery, and I'm glad all these babies are finally here! I can't wait to meet Sabine and Sammy in person.
We just had an earthquake, are you allowed to be mad at mother nature? Kaleb didn't sleep very well last night. Went down just fine, slept initially for about 4 hours and then was really restless the rest of the night, wanting to get up every 1/2 hour to hour - AUGH! I finally got him to take a nap, he usually sleeps on this big baby pillow we have on the floor in our living room. He fell asleep at about 11:15, and I gratefully crashed next to him on the couch. He had rolled himself up on the side of the pillow on his side when there was a fairly noticeable earthquake, and it managed to roll him the rest of the way off the pillow - which of course, woke him up, and now he won't fall asleep again - thanks mother nature!
Which brings me to my next thought, I admire single parents, they are so amazing that they can handle it! Whether it be that the spouse is out of the home for work, or other reasons, I don't think I could do it; I guess we can do anything if we have to, but, if it came to that point, I'm moving back to UT with mom and dad (I'm thinking you won't mind) Jake is gone this whole week for Scout camp, it has only been one day and one night by myself, I still have 4 nights and 5 days to go without him I can't believe I'm falling apart already! I'm sure in large part it has something to do with lack of sleep last night. There are only so many hours you can rock a baby before you need to say, okay, get out of bed, it's your turn...but, I'm the only one here to rock and pace with the baby. Now, I realize I have many amazing friends that I could call on and they would come hold Kaleb in a heartbeat, but even I'm not cruel enough to call at 3AM That's when having a spouse home comes in handy! Did I also mention, Jake has the car? Walking to the laundromat yesterday wasn't so bad, Kaleb did really well. I admire single parents, and marvel at how they can do it without being completely insane or hating their children! This is when not living 12 hours (and having a car) away from mom and dad come in handy, I would be over there in a heartbeat...too bad I couldn't find anyone driving out to UT this week (that was coming back sometime soon) Siiigh - so here I rock and pace praying hard for love and patience and an interpretation of tongues, or baby cries, and when all else fails, I'm taking out the garbage or checking the mail-again-(there's not much else you can do when you just need to walk outside and breath)
Okay, really, it's not THAT bad, I think I'm just way tired. We have some amazing friends who are out of town the next few weeks so they left their 2nd car here with us in case I need it. Still, I would never choose to be a single parent ever in my life! I love Kaleb more than anything, but, I'm still pondering if I love being a Mom all the time.
Kaleb finally fell asleep again so I'll stop babbling, it's hard to type one handed anyway, and hope both of us can get some sleep.

Family Outing

Another of the hard adjustments for me is getting used to the fact that we have a new scheduler in the family, and he is very demanding. Jake had this past Thursday and Friday off and I had grand plans of things I wanted to do but when it came time to go Kaleb would be asleep or would be hungry and things just weren't working out so I was getting annoyed that I was stuck in the house, or that Jake and I couldn't just get away on our own. Yesterday we were going to leave a bit early and head out to spend the day in Santa Barbara, Kaleb decided to sleep in until 10:30 Okay, I really can't complain too much about that, but, I wanted to go to the beach! Going very far away was out but Jake still got me to the beach (even if I couldn't go swimming, have to wait for my 6 week Dr. appointment to tell me I'm healed and back to normal (ha ha)) We made it to Zuma beach about an hour away, it was crowded, we're too cheap to pay $7.00 to park so it took 3 or 4 drive by passes before we FINALLY found street parking, at that point Jake was grumpy and Kaleb was screaming himself purple and foaming at the mouth (which I'm sure added to Jake's irritation) we have discovered he hates being in his carseat if he's not moving or if he's awake (usually meaning he's hungry or needs a diaper change) Everyone survived and I got to get my feet wet in the ocean! Except I forgot Kaleb's hat (I still have a lot of mommy stuff to learn) so we just hung out under the umbrella the whole time (best Costco purchase!) Kaleb was pretty much asleep through it all but I'm sure he still had fun (I got a picture of him smiling, he couldn't hide it!) I think he could taste the salt in the air because he kept turning his head around and smacking his lips together and licking them, it was pretty funny to see. He is sleeping a bit better now (knock on wood) the past few nights have been 3-4 hour blocks, some only 2 hours, but, better! He is eating better, doesn't spew as much out, and he is getting so big, almost outgrown the bassinet in length. His cheeks are starting to get rounder along with his belly. He is so much more aware of what's going on around him, he'll follow people around the room with his eyes, and turn his head when someone walks in. He still looks like a bobble head but he is getting so good at holding up his head and moving it. He's so funny to sit and watch! We just fall more and more in love each day (if that's possible!)
I can't believe Kaleb is already almost a month old! He did a lot better at church today, he ate at 10 and then Jake was able to just give him a bottle during Sunday School, I love not having to take Kaleb with me to Primary, despite the fact that it's hard to play one handed if you have a fussy kid, there are a lot of germy kids in the Primary room, especially the older girls who always want to hold and play with all the babies! It made me realize, church is possible with a baby, but I still don't know how our mother's did it with 5 and 8 kids! (brave women I admire you)
And...I sent out an email but in case someone didn't get it - we're planning on blessing Kaleb on August 31st so if you can make it we would love to have you here! If you need info on area hotels or anything else just let me know.

Give and Take

This my second installment to our little story. My wife posted an addition on here that really disturbed me. I asked if I could delete it, and she said only if I posted an addition to replace the deleted post. So here I am chiming in again. Kaleb is really growing quick and we are all trying to figure out what that means. He is becoming very aware of his surroundings, tracking movement with his eyes, and changing his rhythm every chance he gets. He is definitely keeping us guessing. But luckily for him, he won't really remember our trial and error period of child weaning.

-Jake

Welcome Sam

My sister Emily had her baby Sammy yesterday morning, and can I say to her, she is a trooper! I think 22 is Sam's lucky number, he was born on 7/22 at 6:22 Am and was 22 inches long, and, 9 LB 11 OZ. I can't even fathom 2 pounds bigger than Kaleb! Emily had him naturally with a midwife in the birthing center, and no tearing either! Sam came out with a 3 foot umbilical cord, not the usual 1 foot, so he had plenty to jump rope, and play with, which is probably why he had it wrapped around his head a few times and under his arm. Him not breathing is probably why labor was so long and progress so slow, thankfully the midwife was super amazing and was able to get him breathing again before cutting the cord so he didn't also have the blood loss. I'm so glad Emily and Sam are doing okay and they didn't have to be transfered to the hospital. Can I just say again, Emily you are amazing to get that baby out! As far as I was told everyone is doing well, they were home about 5 hours after birth and I'm sure super tired and hopefully still sleeping this morning. I'm excited to meet you Sam, get the triplet cousins together. Sabine, you are all alone in Heaven now, it's time to come play! (my sister Shawna was due a few days ago with her little girl, we're all still just waiting)

Punk Rocker

Like Father Like Son





There isn't ever much going on in our lives at the present time, every moment is spent trying to figure out what Kaleb needs and trying to sleep. I tell you, this sleep deprivation thing can't be explained, it is a whole new level of tired. You never really understand it until you are going through it. I really took for granted when I could sleep for 10 straight hours or more if I felt like it. That has probably been the hardest adjustment for me is the waking up every two hours and being awake for an hour or more. Kaleb hasn't been sleeping as well lately, sometimes only in 1-2 hour blocks, so that has been really hard on us all, I think him included because he seems grumpier during the day. The hardest part is getting him to fall asleep, we still haven't figured out what works best for him so once he wakes up to eat, diaper change, etc. we have to rock him for at least an hour or more (sometimes that doesn't even work) before he'll finally succumb to sleep and let us lay him back down. We all made it to church today, another schedule we need to figure out. Just as we wanted to leave at 10:45 Kaleb decided he was hungry, we thought he could wait at least a half hour but he wasn't having any of that, when he wants something, he wants it now. I spent all of sacrament meeting feeding and trying to calm Kaleb down into sleeping, so I felt like I wasn't even there. Also he managed to completely miss an entire blanket thrown over my shoulder and spew a bucket drench all down my dress and neck after being at church for only a few minutes - pleasant timing - thank you, now I have three hours of sticky skin, and crunchy hair and clothes (I love being a mother!) Life goes on, we learn one day at a time. Kaleb seems to be more alert and aware when he's awake, and he has quite the facial expressions (especially when he's falling asleep) I think I'll just post a lot of pictures so you can see why, despite everything, we keep him around, he's just so cute and squishable!

Update

How many times can I add something in one week?
Kaleb is growing so big it's hard to keep up with his progress, but I want to keep everyone informed. He had his first doctor appointment yesterday and the doctor was really impressed with how well he is doing. He is slightly above average in growth rate for his age. He has gained back his birth weight plus 2 OZ. for a total weight of 7 LBS 13 OZ and he has grown a 1/4 of an inch to an even 20 inches long. I guess normally babies haven't gained on top of their birth weight until they're 2 weeks old. We must be doing something right! Yesterday he seemed to be more awake and aware during the day and he slept in 3-4 hour stretches last night (lets hope for that again tonight!) He is currently wide awake sitting in my lap as he helps me write this (making waffles and holding him didn't work as well) He is really interactive lately and at times will mimic your facial expressions, especially sticking the tongue out! He's already growing faster than we thought possible!

A guy's perspective on becoming a father.

This is first of my additions to our blog. I have to admit that I was pretty frightened on becoming a father. Being responsible for a wee infant really had me kind of freaked out. But as I saw my son born, that glorious miracle of child birth, I realized what it means to be a father. It is just another piece of my life that fell into place to help me feel more complete. I love being a dad. The 5:30 am feedings (I get home from work around 2:00 am), the diaper changes, the baths, doing dishes so Kristen can rest, just feels right. It is greater than I could ever imagine.

On a more humorous note, the golden showers that Kaleb has decorated his room with were quite funny. But you would think I would learn from the first time to keep the diaper on a little longer? Oh well, welcome to parenthood.

-Jake

Oh Boy

I must add a P.S. this morning.
Kaleb is really breaking us in to the joy of boys. Last night I had to change his poopy diaper 3 times in less minutes than that. Jake took over for a diaper change at 2:30AM I'm just settling in to sleep when I hear Jake gut laughing, now I have to see what is up. I walk in to Kaleb's room to see a nice wet arc streaking from the changing table to the floor. Yes, he was marking his territory, or christening his room. This morning Kaleb managed to do it again to Dad, only this time it went behind the changing table. HA HA HA
All one can do is laugh and say, welcome to parenthood!

In the Blink of an Eye

It's crazy to realize little Kaleb is a week old already. He already is growing up too fast. Things are going really well and he is such a good baby and so fun to be around. He has quite the range of facial expressions, and such a personality! He is already quite adept at holding up his head, and loves to have his feet free, seems to be constantly on the go. He sleeps with one leg straight up in the air, and I have found it resting up on the edge of the bassinet while he was sleeping. He has been doing the typical only sleep two hours and then get hungry, so we're a bit tired, but it's worth it when he is so cute! He doesn't cry all that often, but he certainly is a grunter! Jake is such an amazing Dad and helps out so much, it's crazy to realize, wow, this little baby came from us, look what we created! It's quite an amazing thing to see the look in Jake's eyes whenever he sees his son, or has to leave him to go to work, how much you can love someone. Kaleb's Grandma Stevens was so amazing and willing to come stay for a week and get to know her first grandson, Grandpa came on Sunday and they both just left today. It was hard to see them go, and a bit overwhelming to realize we're on our own, now what do we do? I can't just pass the baby off to a very eager grandparent at 4AM when he decides he's wide awake? I am so grateful for their help and love, and it was so fun to see Kaleb get to know them better. I am especially grateful that I got to sleep so much, I hope I can keep that up! We will have to get a webcam really soon so Kaleb can continue to interact with his grandparents. Does being a grandparent officially make one old? I still love being a Mom and love the look Kaleb gets in his eyes when he hears my voice and looks at me (or past me, or whatever it is he does) There is no greater feeling than the love of a newborn. I can sense how much more spiritual our place feels with his sweet spirit so close still to Heaven, oh how wonderful it would be sometimes to know what he dreams about or what he sees or thinks about. I never understood the love of a parent until I became one myself. I hope Kaleb forgives me for my learning, stumbling, and shortcomings.

This is Love...I tell you

We came home from the hospital yesterday afternoon...and they let us bring a baby with us!
Kaleb Bruce was born at 6:45 PM on Monday June 30th. It was a long day. We went in at 6AM I was already in early labor so it took them a few hours to decided that I still needed some pitocin to help speed things along. I also got an epidural, I really liked that! As Jake was sitting there watching the contraction monitor, he would comment "oooh that's a big one" "really? Cool" and I would fall back asleep. I don't regret getting pictocin or an epidural, it was time for him to come, and I know things wouldn't have worked out normally if he was any bigger. After 1 1/2 hours of pushing I know the Dr. was getting nervous and was almost thinking about having to do a c-section (there was no way I was going for that after all my hard work!)
We had the best OB/GYN she was so fantastic and gentle and really helped everything work out in the end, although she had to keep calling more nurses in to help push and pull. She ended up having to do an episiotomy and use the vacuum but it didn't effect his head too much at all. Those were things I didn't want, but, there was no way it would have happened any other way. I loved though that the OB would make me say yes or no, she really made sure my wishes were respected, "Is it OK if I do this or that" I had to vocalize "yes" He came out bright red, with his eyes wide open, his tongue sticking out and a crazy mohawk of dark hair with blond tips, and ready to eat. We're both doing good. I'm really sore but sitting is getting a bit easier. Kaleb is doing well, doesn't cry too much, just grunts and coos. The biggest thing we're dealing with is that we had him circumcised and I can only imagine why that hurts like nothing else whenever he pees, that really gets him using his lungs. I love being a mother, and it just seems so natural like he has always been here, or belonged here. This is love, I tell you!
I am so grateful Jake's Mom and my sister Shawna (due in 3 weeks!) were able to fly in from UT. on Mon. to be here for the birth, and for me (although I'm sure it was more to see the baby)
Thank you all for your kind words, love and supoprt...we think he's rather cute also and are excited we get to keep him!